I Tried Yoga Class Today

No matter how early I get up, it takes forever to get out of the house. Get the boys dressed, one has to potty, the other gets his clothes dirty and needs to be changed but after that change of clothes needs to potty also (sigh). I have almost given up on going to Zumba classes, it just too frustrating. But the problem with skipping Zumba is that I get cranky when I go too long without getting my sexy on. So instead of skipping today, I went to the gym anyway just in time for the last two songs of the class.

It was a warmup I guess, I’ll take what I can. Then I went to the elliptical for 4 minutes and 35 seconds…I was not in the mood. How do I make the best of this?

I look in the class room and 4 gentlemen were there stretching on yoga mats. I walk up to my husband who is sexily working the weights and tell him in my grumpiness that there is a men’s yoga class. He told me to just try it out and that if I didn’t feel comfortable, to just stay at the back the class. I told him I was going on the bike instead, but on my way there the women started trickling in, so I followed suit.

I went to the back of the room, but I went to the opposite of the door so that I would stick it out for the whole hour. An older lady stationed herself right next to me, just like best friends do, so now I really have to stick it out. If she can do it….

The room started to get hot and I had not had breakfast. If I eat before working out, even if it is 3 hours before, I get cramps and get uncomfortably gassy (sorry if TMI). But being in a quiet room while getting hungry brings the fear of the tummy roar. So, here I am supposed to be focusing on breathing, instead, my mind will not shut up.

“I am so hungry”
“My stomach is going to roar”
“Don’t roar, don’t roar, don’t roar”

Downward dog, child’s pose and back again, another thought took over.

“Why am I so gassy?”
“Oh, no no no no no no no!!!”

Breathing I am, doing all of these poses I do not know the names to and my mind still racing, but now all I could hear is Elsa singing “Let it Go” and even though the gassiness subsided and I did not let it go, now I was just trying not to laugh now.

“Breath in….breath out”

Downward dog, raise your left up, bend the knee…look down, square off you shoulders and then the hips, deep breath in, exhale bring your left foot down…”

After a while I caught on…hooray! Moving on to a pose called the pigeon
“Holy Mother of Pelvis” that was stretching places I never knew I had. There were other poses that you can’t pay me to remember, but that hurt so good. But just then, I look at the clock…5 minutes till the gyms daycare closes and I have to get the kids out.

The instructor put on a song and as we layed on our backs “focusing on our breathing” she says, “honor yourself by giving yourself permission to relax at this moment”. And this is my mind…

“Honor myself, relax…breath in…how fast can I get my stuff from the locker? STOP, breath in…breath out…is it 12? I hope he got the kids….stop..he knows….relax…deep breath.”

We sit up and take a couple of breaths, being thankful…yeah, yeah, yeah. Thankful for this practice. “NAMASTE”

In full speed I bolted and went into the locker room, put clothes on top of my workout clothes and ran out. The kids were already out on the van eating pistachios with daddy…and so onto the bookstore we go!

Guess what? I can’t wait to do it again…

Until Next Time,