Chilly Chilly


We did not leave the house today….the below cero weather is not very friendly. The boys agree with me that we need to go to the beach somewhere. The whole country is too cold right now. How long until this weather lightens up?

This cabin fever has us going crazy! I am literally packing for a vacation that we have not planned, that we have no money for. But it seems to give me some hope, something to look forward to. I am going to bundle up for now and try not to freeze.

Until Next Time,

Pack the flip flops!

The Art of Asking for Help

I do everything by myself. When my husband is at work. I can be as sick as a dog with bitter cold weather and I get things done on my own, no matter how exhausting and sanity deteriorating it can be. I do however, know my limitations (most of the time). But isn’t that the job of a parent?

I do not go overloading my schedule. I enjoy stopping at random moments and just marveling at the beautiful faces God has allowed me to create. I wonder, how could I ever forget these enchanting faces? Alas, there has been times where I have seen a photograph where my heart just melts and cries at the same time because I have forgotten that beautiful face in that moment in time.

I do not by any means have it all in order…I am disorganized and my brain sometimes feel like all knowledge has been sucked out of it. But no matter what, I do what needs to be done (most of the time).

One of the discussions my husband and I have had for the past 5 years is that I never ask for help when I need it. That all I need to do is ask his parents for help. My parents live very far away, so I do not have them around to give me a hand, but I never feel comfortable asking for help. It makes me feel incompetent.

A little bit of background. Any time we hang out with the family, the grandparents are tied up to their daughters kids because she always need help, so either I have to take care of her kids so that my kids can have some time with their grandparents or I have to explain to my children, why once more, they can’t play with them.¬†So now we just have play dates, with Grandma and Papa, where we leave the boys so they can have some time with the grandparents.

I also feel that if I ask for help, it would be imposing. I was wrong,¬†people in the family would say. But wrong, I was not! Let me tell you what happened at my boys party…

While skating with my little guy, my husband called out to me that he lost his wallet and he needed help. In a panic, I went to Papa to please get my little guy¬†because I had to run to find a wallet. I told my niece, “come baby” because I was going to bring her to her mommy, reason being, my little guys doesn’t feel comfortable with other family members because he doesn’t know them well. Her mom said, “she’s okay one her own”, so I said “ok” and went on. So, Papa grabbed my son and in less than a minute went back to the “princess” and they skated together. And that was that, right? Oh no!!!

We get a phone call that the “princess” (I am going to call her) drew a picture of her auntie taking away her “Papa” and that it really made her sad. Obviously, it was something that needed to be addressed. So, when I asked what I did wrong, I was told nothing. I was not rude to anyone. So apparently, the only thing I did was rob a kid 30 seconds of Papa, take me to jail, I am guilty, lol.

Things are rainbows and unicorns when I am the one taking the loads for the family, when my kids get no time, when they bully my kids and literally get told¬†to let the kids grow out of it without consequence, but the 30 seconds I took away from the princes and the 2 ¬†minutes she had to share her Papa while I looked¬†for the wallet causes the princess a mental disturbance and an issue in the family…

So, to solve the problem, I promised I’d never ask for help again and my husband promised me that that he would never get on me about asking for help again. Win-win.

The funny thing about this is that my son asked me not to invite them to his birthday party. When I asked why, he said because the girls are mean to him and because he wanted to spend time with his grandparents. How I wish he did not have to deal with this!

How I wish some times that my parents were close, or that I had any of my family near me, so on days like today, I could just have a hug. I don’t want anything else, just a hug.

But looking at the bright side, I now know that I am in the mercy of a 4 year old and need to walk on eggshells near her  I got to stand up for myself for the first time in 11 years and that feels like a triumph. I need to set an example for my boys if I want them to do the same.

Until Next Time,

I hope I figured that one out