LOL if my husband saw the title of this, he would frown at me and think I’m just being mean. But really, it is one of the biggest disagreements we have, EVER!
I do not like any of my family names or his. But he feels that we should name our kids after his dad to honor him or himself just to pass his name down since I don’t like my family names.
My first son, we named after his grandfather on his mother’s side. He was his first grandchild, he also had requested from us out of the whole family to name our son after him 3 years before that…before we were even married. And even that was a war, because his sister “forbade” us to use the name even though she wasn’t even pregnant.
Our second son…WW3 part 2 because he wanted to name his son after his dad or himself. My question is…WHY CANT OUR KIDS JUST HAVE THEIR OWN NAME? SERIOUSLY! (See? I’m choked up as I write this.)
We “compromised” and chose a name that we both liked and Daddy’s middle name.
This unborn one…at first Babe was like “you have to go through this, you get to pick”, until we found out it was a boy. We had a girl name… Anna Ivette…but no boy name because I didn’t even want to think about it. I liked the name Samuel and he was on board, but his dad randomly requested for us not to name him that…weird huh?
I had told my mom who doesn’t talk to anyone. Anyway…the whole naming the kid after his dad came up again because his dad being the nicest man in the world, deserves to be honored!
But I have a dad too, one who lost his only son… Who’s last name will not be passed down..who would mean the world to him if I named my son after him. Which ironically is the same name as my father in law, but in Spanish. But even then, I do not like either name and I will not name my kid after my dad.
So this is Babes compromise…his dad middle name in Spanish and my dad’s middle name. To me, that is not a compromise…it’s a guilt trip that only ends with an ugly name…lol (he thinks I’m hateful for feeling so strongly). But to me, I rather name my kid Seymore Butts.
May I mention, I also did not like my first sons name and he refuses to answer if I call him by his name. Asking me why did I have to name him that. My poor kid, I already had called it that he wasn’t going to like his name before he was born. (I know because I don’t like my own name for numerous reasons).
So… I had called my mom yesterday and she asked how was baby Samuel. I told her that my Father in law, doesn’t like the name so we are up on the fence again. This is her response “of course, because it’s not a name from THAT side of the family. So you don’t have to fight, you’re just going to give up and name him after one of them. But now I am going to call him Baby William (her dad’s name) to remind you that they are not the only family you’ve got.” Talk about a slap in the face!
It’s the truth (not the part about my father in law not liking the name because it’s not his, but the rest of it)… And I know this, I feel like crap about it…but I hate the guilt trips, I hate arguing about it. I cannot stand the fact that even though I am the one who is sick as a dog, getting screwed for life with stretch marks, my life taking the back seat to carry and care for my children (not complaining about caring for my kids). That I have to consider other people while naming MY children.
Of course I get what my husband is saying, but seriously, it’s not my fault everyone has names that I don’t like. We are from different cultures so think it would be punishing the kids. (I know, mean) lol.
Anyway, I feel absolutely sick about it… I won’t even mention my conversation with my mom to Babe because he’s not going to like it and because I am going to cry about it because I am so danm frustrated about it. I have that lump on my throat from wanting to cry.
I want to scream into a pillow and run away. Yes, it’s my childish side coming out, but I am soooo sick it…I am even going to ask my doctor about getting my tubes tied, cut and burned. No, I don’t want a girl, no- I never want to be pregnant again and No way in hell do I want to name another child.
I can blame it on the hormones, but even when I was not pregnant… “Naming the kids” was the crappiest part.
Wish me luck guys…pray I don’t burst into tears when someone asks me if I “have a name, yet”.
I’m signing off now, I don’t want to think anymore.